I've been wondering what it is exactly that makes it so easy for me to not want friends.
Is it that I found myself in recovery mode in my bed for several months? Or is it who I am but try to overcompensate for it by being that friend? You know 'that' friend. I'm sure we all play that card at times. Don't get me wrong, I love socializing - that is at least I thought I did. Until that ill fated day arrived where I was drugged and just out of surgery. I all of a sudden was very choosy of who I wanted to interact with and let me tell you; it was a limited circle. And those that were there I treated down right horribly. That's how I view it anyways. It makes me sick when I have flash backs to the hospital and the things I said to others and the way I responded. My attitude has been sorely affected. It has been a long recovery process; one of which I'm still undergoing. I know that jumping into this next surgery may make it worse but hopefully it won't get the best of me and I can nip this silly attitude in the butt. I blame it on many different sources but who am I kidding...I choose to respond to the circumstances. I am the one that enables the affect things have on me. Hopefully I can continue to recognize my shortcomings and build a stronger mechanism within to allow for a more submissive attitude. Either way I knew going into these surgeries that it would change me. I'll do whatever it takes to ensure I don't let this opportunity to be a stronger and better me go to waste. Until then know that I love life, perhaps there are moments I dislike but overall LOVE is the name of the game. I hope you all are well! And enjoying this festive holiday season! Love to you*
And a quote to leave you with...I used to read up on Maya Angelou all the time while I was in high school and something I read of hers once has always stayed with me. Perhaps it will do the same for you. "I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel."
1 day ago
2 sweet comments on "What would you think if I sang out of tune?"
That's a very heartwarming quote Steph. I'm sorry to hear that something landed you in the hospital, causing you to mistrust others. I can understand where you're coming from.
However, I'm a pretty firm believer in that people are good at heart. It might be difficult to trust other people but I'd say definitely give it a shot because most people I'm sure care very much about you!
That is one of my favorite quotes of all time! And I too am sorry to hear that this recovery has been so hard on you. But you always seem to have a positive attitude and outlook regardless, so that is very admirable! And thank you for that sweet comment on my blog. Notice I'm not in any pictures? That's because I got maybe a total of 5 hours of sleep all week and looked like crap!
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